My experience of pain

Today I am going to talk about a subject that is an ongoing problem in our school systems.

After yesterdays school shooting in Ohio,  I hope parents will open their eyes to the problems that some kids can create.

Bullies not only are wrong,  but can quickly grow out of control.  But, what about the children who are at the brunt of the bullying?  In this case listed above, the victim went on a shooting spree at his school.  I am in no way  defending this bully,  but people also need to understand what a bully can do to someones mind.

I was a victim many times to bullies in my teen years.  Actually it was from grade school all the way to high school.  I was constantly called names such as four eyes (glasses), nerd, ugly duckling, st. bernard, barnyard freak, and many more that I can't even post about.  I hid from other people at school and would be a loner because it was too painful to be around it.  I begged my parents all the time to stay home sick or to be home schooled away from it all.  I seriously think if I would have been home schooled my self esteem would have been much better without the teasing from other people.

I never was involved in fighting at school.  I would try to ignore it and just go on with my school day.  When I reached high school, it didn't improve even though we were suppose to be maturing.  I actually had my first fist fight in high school due to the constant bullying and abuse.  First and only fight at school that resulted in 3 days suspension.  Did the bully receive anything? No.  As a matter of fact they became even more popular for it.  When I arrived back, I was ridiculed even more and teased about it again.

Is it any wonder that kids finally snap under the constant torment of bullies?  Do the schools even care about what is going on?  I believe the school teachers and such do want to help, but the school officials would rather ignore it and continue to receive their money benefits for having the kids in school.  They really could care less about bullies no matter what they tell the public.  You never hear from them until something like the shooting in Ohio happens.  Then they want to tell their side and put on a good show for everyone.

What about the parents of these bullies?  Do they even care what they are doing to another human being?  They need to think about how it would be if the roles were reversed and it was their child being bullied.  Not so pretty now is it?

As my children grow and deal with bullies at school, I gave them one rule about fighting.  If you are bullied and they strike first, by all means beat the ever-loving-shit out of them and get suspended.  I will support my child in this.  If that bully is brave enough to strike my child first, they better believe that my child is not going to stand up for it.  Some parents criticize me for this.  I don't care.  Yes, I am telling my child to fight, but ONLY in defense.  I am in no way telling my child to become a bully and go looking for a fight.

I have also raised my children to be friends with everyone.  If they see someone by themselves and in need of friend, I tell my children to spend lunch with them and just talk to them.  My children are happy and they enjoy just being friends with someone without having to worry about social standings in school.  If everyone would just forget about wealth, popularity, race and religion, everyone could be happy in school with each other. I am proud of how my children have not fallen victim to bullies or become one themselves. Can the parents of bullies actually say honestly that they are proud of their children?

At times I wonder why I even brought children into this messed up world we live in.  But I realize that the world is much better with my children in it.  They are making a difference and I hope other parents will help in the fight against bullies before a shooting is a daily occurrence at all schools.