For Our Aunt Dutchess with love!!!

Remember a few posts back how The Sir and I were going to create a new toy for The Dutchess? I asked for everyone's opinion on it and we tried to put together something similar.

Well, we all know that you fuckers are tight wads with your money, so funds were limited.  We thought about it for a bit and some things had to be taken away from the idea.  I mean, Southern Comfort, Gin, Xanax, heels and uniforms are not cheap! So most of our money has been tied up with those things and we all have those priorities high up on the Royal's list first.

Now, this is just the first toy we have come up with.  We still have plans on making toys for the rest of the Royal family, and trust me---we have some crazy ideas for them!  Each item will fit the personality of each Royal! So be sure to keep checking back hookers! You will be jealous!

So let me introduce you to The Dutchess Ass Minimizer!!!

Now this is just the test phase!  We will have to lengthen it for more leg room.  Notice the wagon that follows behind it that CB requested for her drunk ass to be hauled in as well.  The side car had to go, because after many test runs, we couldn't keep our drunk asses from tipping sideways! So instead, we added the shade umbrella to the top so our Dutchess doesn't get an evil sunburn. The snow plow also had to be removed because it got in the way of the pedaling.  If you remember the faster you pedal, the better the vibrating seat.
PRIORITIES people!  Vibrations trump plows any day!

But as we were in the midst of building this, we ran out of money.  With CB on vacation AGAIN, funds were running low. So instead we improvised and this is the final product that is being delivered to The Dutchess this week!

Oh yeah. You all are fucking jealous aren't you?!